I figured it out, I was listening to Shaunna Menard MD talk today and she said ‘if you want to change your life, you have to change your story’.
You know when you have those moments like ‘drrrrr, of course that’s it’ but I ready knew it, I’d heard it before – why did I not remember it this time? I’ve been struggling with anxiety this week. Its not out of control anxiety, I can see it, I know I need to move but I also know that I’m feeling it because a big – massive change is coming in my conscious and subconscious.
And as I write this I can feel my chakras open, so I know I’m on the right track.
In this space, this time, I know that control isn’t the right approach. I actually need to let go and allow this change to move through me. I choose to believe that I’m in the right place, at the right time and that I’ll be ok on the other side. My rational brain has been saying ‘you always get anxious before something big – so this is normal’ for example, I’m always a mess the week before my brother’s anniversary but on the day, except when we’re all at the cemetery together, it could be like any other day. So as the week rolls around I know I’ll be ok and I know that I have my wonderful husband and amazing friends who will hold space for me. I know that to be true.
Here is my story, this story, and it’s one I’ve repeated over and over again in my life. When I tell you the ‘issue’ – please insert whatever’s right for you e.g. weight, relationships, career, friends – whatever it is, insert away and then have your ‘ah-ha’ moment about the story you need to upgrade.
My story is:
‘I’ve worked hard all year and now I’m putting the weight back on.’
I totally feel like a failure, although I tell myself otherwise. I feel like I’m sabotaging myself and let me tell you, I’ve had a red hot go – ok well not red hot because if I did my home would be takeaway heaven and honestly, that stuff tastes like crap LOL. Like the convo I had with Chris last Friday afternoon ‘yes we can have pizza but it has to be from an Italian restaurant, none of this fast food crap’ ha ha. So totally not red hot. Chris’ caramel slice however…oh that was fun!!
I’ve been digging into my emotions and then I saw the story. I saw the story repeat itself over and over again. I work hard, then I stop. I work hard, then I stop. Ummmm what do I thinks going to happen when I stop?? and perhaps I could entertain the idea of working out ‘sustainably’ rather than hard to create more longevity and less stopping – oohhh isn’t that an interesting thought.
Now I did think that perhaps your perfect, perhaps you don’t have these stories and perhaps your reading this because you think I’m funny/crazy/interesting/weird but you, you’ve got it all together and if you do – go girl, keep doing what your doing!! If you don’t, know that its ok and where you are right now, right this very second is where you need to be.
So I’m choosing to reframe this story, I’m choosing to create a NEW story and that excites me. Its my story from here on in – no more stopping, resting yes, but stopping no. No more wondering why this is happening to me – again. No more being my own victim. So here goes, my new story is:
- I am healthy and well.
- I love exercising my mind, body and soul.
- I love turning up for me and nourishing my body in a loving and sustainable way.
- I love smiling while I’m challenging myself because I know my future self will thank me for it.
That feels better, that feels like I’m loving my amazing life that I know I have. That all feels possible right – there’s no ‘failure’ in there, no setting myself up for failure and putting the bar so high that I can’t sustain it. I’m all those things right now and I will be all those things tomorrow.
Now tell me, what is your new story and lets celebrate together how amazing and incredible we all are xo
